If you only watch one video out of the Dark Knight PSA series on YouTube, make it this one.

Every so often I feel like I miss out by not making the trek down to Comic-Con. This is one of those times.

I find that one word sums these commercials up better than anything else: Shipoopi!

It’s gas prices like these (spotted last night on the corner of Cahuenga and Franklin in Hollywood) that make me really glad that I take the Red Line to work.

It should be noted that I filled up on Monday in northernmost Orange County for $4.13 for regular — so this station is likely gouging a bit due to its proximity to the freeway and tourist spots — but that doesn’t really matter. This sign feels like a fairly decent indicator of what’s to come.

Now if you’ll excuse me, it looks like it’s time to go price out a bicycle…

Dew Be Due Bee do
ERIS is Loki in Drag
and of Course Lassie as The Beaver

If I knew who it was from, I’d give credit — but now that I’ve cataloged it, into the bag it goes.

I just have to go on record and say that this shot for shot recreation of the video for Journey’s “Separate Ways” is seriously the best thing that I’ve seen all week. If you even sort of like Journey, you owe it to yourself to stop everything you’re doing and soak all of its majesty in right this second.

I mean, watching “Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” while listening to the Cramps and drinking some whiskey doesn’t really lend itself to the whole “strictly enforced dress code” experience, does it?

I guess Bar 107 just became my weekender when I’m downtown.

Then, after the cashier rings up everything she perks up and says, “Oh, I have coupons!” and proceeds to hand the guy behind the counter a stack for at least a dozen things. Still, I refuse to lose my cool. The Dude abides.

When she goes for her checkbook to pay tho, I start to get a little bent.

“Now, I can write this for up to $50 over?” she asks.
“Yeah, but I have to call my manager over for approval.” the cashier responds.
She ponders this for a bit while filling out her check and then hands it to him.

It’s for $50 over.

The cashier — also starting to get visibly flustered — calls his manager to his register. The manager keys in a code and the check processes thru. Everyone in line can see the light at the end of the tunnel when the cashier gets out two twenties and two fives.

“Can I get that in fives?” the lady chirps, oblivious to everyone’s sighs, groans and forehead slaps.
“Yeah, alright…” the cashier defeatedly replies. “5-10-15-20-25-30-35-40-45-50 is your change.”

As she stuffs the money into her wallet, and we all prepare to get this person out of our lives, she pulls two twenties out of her wallet and says, “Before you close that, do you have enough fives to change these out?”

Are you fucking kidding me?! I feel like snapping off some snide remark or schooling the gal on the finer points of express aisle etiquette, but I’m just dumbstruck at the spectacle that has unfolded before me.

The guy pulls out a stack of paper-clipped fivers and counts off even faster, “510152025303540.”

“Thanks,” she responds. And then to nobody in particular she yammers on, “I owe a bunch of coworkers lunch tomorrow, so I thought I’d just—”
“Miss,” the manager interrupts “I’m sure these people would love to hear your story, but they’ve been waiting in line for 5 minutes while you took care of what you needed to.”
“How rude! I’m never going to shop here again!” she crows cramming her money into her wallet and storming out of the store.

I’ve never heard a line of people at the supermarket break out in applause before, but there’s a first time for everything, I guess…

Snakes on a plane? That shit is straight up played out, yo. Zombies on a plane tho? Now that’s something I can get behind!

This trailer makes “Flight Of The Living Dead” (formerly “Plane Dead”) look so horrible that it might end up being hilarious. Fighter jets that are obviously models? Hello Ed Wood! Firing machine guns inside an airliner at 30,000 feet? Holy suspension of disbelief, Batman!

Honestly, if I didn’t love zombies and B movies and I saw this trailer, I’m pretty sure I would be out. So it’s a good thing that I do, I guess… ;)

I guess the burning question for me is, when in the hell is this coming out?

Speaking of coworkers, my boy Nick P. sent me this little public access nugget over internal IM the other day. You should really know that it’s quite dirty for a lot of work and some home environments — if the title “vagina power” didn’t already tip you off, that is — but it is still very hilarious. You should definitely watch it when you have a minute.

Just to get you prepared for the greatness inside, I’ve got a few choice Alexyss Tylor quotes scraped together for y’all to enjoy…

“She insane. Her mind ain’t good because the penis done ejaculated all in her brain.”

“If you want to earn your man, you got to learn your man.”

“With a penis all up in your vagina man, you don’t have no defenses.”

See? It’s totally magical! How could you not want to look now?

Update: Alexyss Tylor has a MySpace! Thanks for the add!