Jason Cosper

Category: General

  • Wither Seven Grand?

    So last night I was informed that Seven Grand is going to enforce a dress code of “collared shirts on the weekends” for the dudes in the new year. I can totally understand why they’d do that — seeing as how it’s a really nice bar and you’d want to discourage the riff-raff from hanging out — but it’s a little dismaying nonetheless. Of course I say that because I’m pretty sure I’m the sort of scruffy riff-raff they’re trying to discourage. It also tends to make things a little less fun and a lot more pretentious.

    I mean, watching “Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill!” while listening to the Cramps and drinking some whiskey doesn’t really lend itself to the whole “strictly enforced dress code” experience, does it?

    I guess Bar 107 just became my weekender when I’m downtown.

  • Wakey Wakey, Eggs And Bakey

    I know it’s not spring yet, but I feel like it might be time to come out of hibernation mode.

    While 2007 was okay overall — with a few highs and lows, just like most other years — I’m seriously ready for it to be over. 2008 is going to be absolutely massive tho.

    So long as I stick to the plan, I have a distinct feeling that my life is about to get way more interesting.

    P.S. There’s a new coat of paint on the blog. If you’re playing along at home, why not pay the site a visit for a change?
    P.P.S. Just so you know, “the plan” doesn’t refer to any sort of resolutions or anything like that. I’ve just laid out a fairly aggressive personal roadmap for the next twelve months, that’s all.

  • The Last 5 Songs I Bought On iTunes

    One of the reasons I love iTunes is because it lets my sometimes questionable and eclectic music tastes be sated with a small handful of button pushes. Yeah, the DRM is a janky pile of shit — as all DRM is — but being able to scratch an itch right away is worth a buck or so to me.

    So in the interest of both show and tell time and internet memes, I’m going to start something up. It might not make it any further than the bits and bytes being transferred here — but I’d like to think my few friends who I’m going to ping to do this will humor me at the very least. Who knows, maybe it’ll spread… *shrug*

    So without further adieu, here are the last 5 songs I bought from iTunes:

    1. Dio – Holy Diver
    2. The Doors – Riders On The Storm
    3. Frank Black – Los Angeles
    4. Ol Dirty Bastard – Shimmy Shimmy Ya
    5. The Jesus And Mary Chain – Sometimes Always

    And the 5 people I’m tagging for this (so long as they actually use iTunes to buy shit, that is) are:

    1. Sean Bonner (Response)
    2. Andre Torrez
    3. Tom Bridge
    4. Matt Haughey
    5. Crystal Williams

    Optimally, these people will do it and tag 5 other folks and the chain will continue. But if they don’t, whatever. I’m not going to be a hardass about it or anything.

    Update: If you don’t “do” the iTMS, listing purchases from eMusic, Amazon’s new mp3 service, Bleep, or even the last few CDs you bought is totally fine by me. The emphasis is on sharing what’s been buzzing thru your skull so much that you had to get it is the point here.

  • Henry Needs A Haircut

    Ever have those days where you feel like the guy from Eraserhead? Yeah, me too…

  • Purgatory

    I damn near had a blistering Larry David style rant moment at the grocery store this afternoon. After getting into the express line with a single bag of cough drops, I notice that the middle-aged lady in front of me has made a mockery of the “15 items or less policy”. Okay, I’m not in any sort of rush. I’ll let it slide.

    Then, after the cashier rings up everything she perks up and says, “Oh, I have coupons!” and proceeds to hand the guy behind the counter a stack for at least a dozen things. Still, I refuse to lose my cool. The Dude abides.

    When she goes for her checkbook to pay tho, I start to get a little bent.

    “Now, I can write this for up to $50 over?” she asks.
    “Yeah, but I have to call my manager over for approval.” the cashier responds.
    She ponders this for a bit while filling out her check and then hands it to him.

    It’s for $50 over.

    The cashier — also starting to get visibly flustered — calls his manager to his register. The manager keys in a code and the check processes thru. Everyone in line can see the light at the end of the tunnel when the cashier gets out two twenties and two fives.

    “Can I get that in fives?” the lady chirps, oblivious to everyone’s sighs, groans and forehead slaps.
    “Yeah, alright…” the cashier defeatedly replies. “5-10-15-20-25-30-35-40-45-50 is your change.”

    As she stuffs the money into her wallet, and we all prepare to get this person out of our lives, she pulls two twenties out of her wallet and says, “Before you close that, do you have enough fives to change these out?”

    Are you fucking kidding me?! I feel like snapping off some snide remark or schooling the gal on the finer points of express aisle etiquette, but I’m just dumbstruck at the spectacle that has unfolded before me.

    The guy pulls out a stack of paper-clipped fivers and counts off even faster, “510152025303540.”

    “Thanks,” she responds. And then to nobody in particular she yammers on, “I owe a bunch of coworkers lunch tomorrow, so I thought I’d just—”
    “Miss,” the manager interrupts “I’m sure these people would love to hear your story, but they’ve been waiting in line for 5 minutes while you took care of what you needed to.”
    “How rude! I’m never going to shop here again!” she crows cramming her money into her wallet and storming out of the store.

    I’ve never heard a line of people at the supermarket break out in applause before, but there’s a first time for everything, I guess…

  • Existential Crisis Of The Day

    How does one go about throwing away a trash can?

  • Keeping It Casual

    Oh Ask MeFi, you’re such a treasure trove of good advice sometimes…

    Here is how you tell if a woman that you meet likes to give casual blowjobs.

    Step 1. Look down. Is there a woman there? If so, move on to step 2.

    Step 2. Is this a casual situation? For example, are there more than 12 people around you? If so, are they wearing flip-flops? Is the amount of time that you have known this woman more likely to be tallied in days, minutes or seconds? If it is minutes or seconds, move on to step 3.

    Step 3. You are a casual blowee. You have determined that you have met a lady who likes to give casual blowjobs. She may also be a fabulous person and/or like to have long-term relationships, but you will have to ask her about that when her mouth isn’t full.

    It may be a bit crass for some of y’all — and I’m sorry if you think it was — but it was still funny enough for me to want to share it.

  • Making Change

    Life’s been this wonderfully weird flurry of events (both expected and unexpected) for a little while now. Quite a few changes have been happening behind the scenes, but I don’t quite feel like sharing them right now. It just doesn’t seem like the right time or place to do so.

    So what’s the use of me posting then? Well, I just wanted to tell the people who care enough to read this site that I’m in kind of a transitionary period right now. And I don’t know where it’s going to take me, but I’m excited to find out. I guess I’ll just know when I get there…

  • Out Of Control

    Oh. Holy. Shit. Go watch this right fucking now.

    Would it help if I said please? Okay, fine…

    Go watch this right fucking now, please.

  • Done With MySpace

    I’ve been arguing with myself over getting rid of my MySpace accounts — both my personal one and the one for Preshrunk — for the past hour. Just ignoring them and turning off notifications doesn’t hurt anything, I guess. Still, the last thing I want is some sort of atrophied social networking profile that sits ignored for months or years until I finally remember that I have it.

    So unless someone can make a good case for keeping them, they’re gone on January 1st.